Emotions
by Love My Faberry
Summary: What if every thing had happened differently? What if Faith opened up and found what she always wanted? A family. All while gaining the love of her life. AU after "Revelations". Definite Fuffy. Also some Willow/Tara. May be a little OOC.
1. Chapter 1

_**A/N: Okay so I'm not too positive where this story is going, but the idea has been kicking around in the back of my head until I found it to hard to ignore so I figured I'd get it out. And what better way to get it out than share it with all you wonderful people. So here it is. Let me know what you think.**_

_**A/N 2: I do not own Buffy the Vampire Slayer. I just play around with the characters sometimes.**_

**Faith**

I hate being in love. It's one of the least wicked situations I've ever been in. What's even worse is being in love with someone who will never love you back. Sitting back watching the person you love pine for someone else, someone not even alive is what really sucks. Here I am again sitting on the bed of my motel listening to Buffy go on and on about Angel. Every since that whole thing with Gwendolyn Post sitch she has been trying it seems she has been trying to get closer together. So after school she's in my room sitting on the edge of my bed talking about **him.** What irks me the most is that I can't bring myself to tell her to shut up. I remember when I first realized that I might have some sort of feelings for Buffy. It was my first week in Sunnydale, I was on the run from Kakistos and getting ready to run again when she stopped me. I was practically paralyzed with fear when I saw him, but she was brave enough to take him on. It was her that gave me the courage to kill the bastard.

"You know Faith, these conversations might be a bit more interesting if you maybe talked back a little," Buffy said.

"You seemed super occupied with your talk about Soulboy. Didn't want to interrupt. Don't really have all that much to say anyway," I told her.

"Not much to say? You've been here for like 2 months and I know practically nothing about you," Buffy said.

"Nothing much to know. Came from Boston. Used to slay there, now I slay here. The end. That's about it, B," I said.

"Really Faith?" Buffy said huffing and rolling her eyes.

I shrugged and smirked. "Fine, B, what do you want to know?"

"Tell me about you're family," Buffy said.

"How about you ask about something else," I said getting off the bed and going towards my homemade punching bag which was really just a coat rack with pillows duct-taped to it.

"You can't tell me to ask you a question and then just refuse to answer," Buffy said slightly angry.

"Okay you want to know about my family. My Pop is an abusive murdering drunk who has been doing time since I was four, and my Ma was a neglectful alcoholic prostitute who really didn't give a damn about me and died when I was thirteen," I said taking a few swings at the "bag".

"Faith I-" Buffy started before I cut her off.

"Please don't, B, the last thing I need is your pity. Look I think it would be best if you just left," I told her.

"But I didn't-"

"Just go!" I yelled.

She walked to the door. As she was leaving she turned back and said, "I'm sorry." Before disappearing out of the door.

After she left I took a few more swings before throwing myself into my bed face first and screaming into the pillow. I must have dosed off because by the time I got up it was dark. I figured I would go slay and blow off some stem. I avoided all the places I knew Buffy usually patrolled in and that was working well. I hadn't seen her all night. I had just made it to the hotel when I felt something grab my arm. I turned with my stake at the ready when I found my wrist in Buffy's hand. I pulled away and started walking towards my room.

"Faith will you please talk to me," she said following me to my room.

"There isn't anything to talk about," I tell her as I go into my room and close the door.

"My mom made lasagne tonight and I brought the leftovers," she called through the door.

This gets my attention because no matter how much I don't want to talk I can't help but love Mrs. S's cooking. I opened the door and let her in. She handed me the container and sat on the bed. I took it, opened it, and leaned back on my dresser while I ate. "Just so you know I only let you in because I have a wicked case of e munchies. So what's up?" I ask.

"Look, Faith, I'm really sorry. I didn't mean to rehash bad memories for you," Buffy said.

"No worries, B. I'm five by five," I tell her as I continue to eat.

"What does that even mean? Five by five. Faith's always five by five. Can't you ever open up and let someone know how you really feel? I'm trying to be here for you Faith, but you always have to make things harder than necessary," Buffy said standing up and moving into my personal space. I swear she's so incredibly hot when she's angry.

"You don't know the first thing about me. If there is one thing I have learned in life is that feelings only lead to disappointment, B," I told her sitting down the container.

"No that's just and excuse. And guess what, F? It's not going to cut it anymore," she said poking my chest.

"Fine, you really want to know how I'm feeling? Okay here it is," I told her gripping her arms and crushing my lips to hers.


	2. Chapter 2

**Buffy**

Faith is kissing me, and I am kissing her back. Oh my god I'm kissing Faith. And I'm enjoying it. Shit. I pulled away quickly and looked at her in shock. Before she could say anything I was out the door and down the street. I kept running until I found myself outside Willow's house. I scaled the tree outside her bedroom and knocked on the window. Willow came to the window a bit bleary eyed and slid the window open.

"Buffy what are you doing here?" Willow asked.

"Will, I really need to talk to you," I told her jumping into the window.

"Okay?" Willow said to me looking confused.

"What is it about me that attracts a certain type of people towards me? What am I some kind of Buffy magnet for the tall, dark, and broody?" I asked pacing her room.

"Is this about Angel?" Willow asked sounding more confused than ever.

"I mean seriously do I have this target over my head that says 'I love big, bad, and mysterious. Please kiss me!'" I asked.

"So this is about Angel. Are you guys getting back together because I'm not sure if that's a good idea with the whole one moment of true happiness revert to Angelus and try to kill us all thing," Willow said.

"Wait what?" I asked Willow.

"I was just saying dating Angel is a bad idea because of the whole Angelus thing," Willow said.

"Why are you talking about, Angel?" I asked.

"Weren't you? I mean you were going on and on about tall, dark, and broody I mean who else do we know that's tall, dark, and- Oh my Goddess it's Faith," Willow said with wide eyes. "Faith kissed you. Why, when, where?"

"In her motel room like fifteen minutes ago. I don't know why," I told her.

"This is insane. I mean I know Faith is all super sexy seduce any man with a pulse girl, but I didn't think she was into the whole girly smooching thing," Willow said. "What happened?"

"Well, I was visiting her, and I was apologizing for earlier-" I started before Willow cut in.

"Wait what happened earlier?" she asked.

"Well, it's not really my place to say, but to sum it up Faith's parents bad, Buffy forced her to talk about it. Anyway I was apologizing and she says that five by five thing again," I was telling her.

"What does that mean anyway?" Willow asked.

"I know, right. it just irked me, so I confronted her about. Then we're all in each other's face and the next thing I know she's kissing me."

"What happened then? What did she say?"

"Nothing I kind of wigged and ran, proving everything she said right. Shit! I have to go back, Will."

"Wait, Buffy, I'm still all confused Willow here."

"I know, and I'm sorry. I will explain everything later, but right now I have to fix things with Faith."

I slipped out of the window and ran to Faith's motel. I made it to the hotel in record time. I went into the room without knocking. When I got in I found Faith with her duffel bag on the bed packing up her stuff. She turned when she heard the door open.

"Wow three visits in one day you really know how to make a girl feel special, B," she said going back to packing.

"Going somewhere?" I asked.

"I'm not really used to staying in one place for this long. I think it's best if I moved on," Faith told me.

"Oh great Faith's running again. That's what you're good at right? You don't get to kiss me and run," I tell her getting angrier by the second.

"Woah, back that up. If I'm not mistaken it was you that ran when I kissed you not the other way around," Faith said.

"What do you call what you you're doing now?"

"Packing. Moving at a pretty much glacial pace here. If I were running I would have been gone long before you got back."

"Whatever, look we need to talk about this Faith. You kissed me."

"And you kissed me back. Good discussion, B, can't wait to do it again."

"Can you please check the sarcasm?"

"Not until you tell me why you are really here. We kissed, you weren't into it, you left, and now we move on and forget it happened. Unless that's not the whole story."

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Well, maybe you were into it. You did kiss me back after all. Maybe you crave me just as much as I crave you."

"You're wrong."

"Am I, B?" She took step towards me and put her hand to my cheek. "Your heart beats faster when I touch you. I bet you feel the same heat, the same electricity being near me as I do when I'm near you. You are waiting breathlessly for the moment when I kiss you again, the moment I make you mine."

I slap her hand away and push her back. "No, that's not going to happen because whether you're right or wrong, I refuse to be another notch on your bedpost. So go ahead pack you're things and leave because I won't spare you a second thought when you're gone."

With that I walk out of her motel room ignoring every signal my body gave me to go back.


	3. Chapter 3

**Faith**

I can't believe it. I might actually have a chance with Buffy. I start to unpack my things and put them back in their places because now I finally have something worth staying for. I'm sure Buffy is at least attracted to me. All I have to do now is insure she falls as hard for me as I have fallen for her. Although first, I will have to prove to her it's about more than sex for me.

"Game on, Buffy," I whispered to myself after I had finished unpacking and was in bed going to sleep.

The next morning I woke up earlier than I ever did, especially on a Saturday. I headed to the flower shop down the street from the motel and went in. After spending about thirty minutes explaining my problem, although forgoing all the supernatural stuff, she put together a flower bouquet made entirely of white flowers and gave them to me telling me that it would represent my pure intentions for the furthering of our relationship. I take the flowers and give her the money then I go to Buffy's house. I was making my way up the walkway when Buffy came out of the door, meeting me halfway.

"I thought you were leaving," she said as she reached me.

"I have a reason to stay," I told her handing the flowers to her.

"They're beautiful," she said taking them.

"So are you," I tell her stepping closer.

"I told you, Faith. I'm not going to be another notch on my headboard that you can just sleep with and move on," she told me shoving the flowers back at me, and marching back towards her house.

"Wait, B, stop. Buffy, please," I said chasing after and grabbing her arm. "I don't want you to be just another notch on my bedpost. You mean more to me than that. That's why I brought the flowers. The women at the flower shop told me they mean pure intentions."

"Pure intentions?" Buffy said turning back.

"I really like you, B. It's not about sex although I won't object if sex is offered," I said offering the flowers again. "I know you are at least attracted to me, or else you wouldn't have kissed me back."

Buffy took the flowers back and smiled. "I have a lot going on right now."

"Yeah, I know with Soulboy and everything, but I want you to know that now that I know I have shot, I won't give up easily," I told her with a wink.

"Do you want to come in? My mom's making breakfast and Willow and Xander are on their way over for some Saturday morning cartoonage," she told me.

"No, I don't want to be horning in on your Scooby time," I said shrugging.

"It's not horning in if you have an invite," Buffy said.

"Great because I'm starved," I told her heading into the house.

"Faith, Buffy said she wasn't expecting you this morning," Mrs. Summers said when I walked into the kitchen while Buffy went up to her room.

"You know me, Mrs. S. Always into the surprises," I said smirking swiping a pancake off the top of the pile she had just finished cooking.

"Well, with two Slayers eating I'm guessing I'm going to need to make more pancakes," she said using the spatula to swat my hand when I tried to steal another. "And no more for you until everyone gets here."

I was about to comment when the door opened revealing Willow and Xander. I smiled largely and grabbed another pancake. "Gangs all here which means I can eat."

"Okay, fine, Faith, but please use a plate," Mrs. Summers told me rolling her eyes.

"No prob, Mrs. S, all over it. What's up Xan-man, Red?" I said with a quick wave.

"Hey, Faith, joining in on the Saturday morning cartoons?" Xander asked.

"That's the plan Xan-man," I said with a wink.

"Awesome the more the merrier I always say," Xander said.

"Yeah, totally great to have you," Willow said blushing.

"What's wrong, Red? You're turning as red as your hair," I asked her.

"Nothing, it's just a little hot in here. I'm hot. Are you hot?" she asked turning to Xander and Mrs. S.

"I feel a bit warm, I guess," Xander said confused.

"Great everyone's here. Grab a plate and lets move this party to the living room," Buffy said as she walked into the kitchen. Then she glance over at Willow and noticing how red she was asked. "Whats wrong with Willow?"

"She's hot," I told her shrugging. Then seeing the look that crossed her face I realized what she thought I meant I backtracked. "I mean she's too warm."

"Right," Buffy said rolling her eyes.

We all fixed our plates and made out way to the living room. We sat down and spent the rest of the morning watching cartoons.


	4. Chapter 4

**Buffy**

The whole time we had been watching cartoons every time Willow would look at Faith she would blush. "I'm going to go find some snacks. Willow, will you help me?" I asked.

"Sure, Buffy, no problem," Willow said standing and following me to the kitchen.

When we got to the kitchen I turned to Willow. "Why do you keep blushing every time you look at Faith?"

"It's your fault," Willow told me.

"My fault how is this my fault?" I asked.

"Every time I look at Faith I picture her kissing you," Willow told me.

"Wanky," I said laughing.

"Buffy this is not funny. I might not be able to look at her the same," Willow said.

"Why not? You can look at me," I told her.

"Because she kissed you, I don't know it's kind of weird to know someone for a couple of months and then suddenly find out she's gay," Willow said.

"Well, Willow, there is something I didn't tell you last night," I said looking at my feet.

"What, Buffy, did something happen?" Willow asked me.

"When Faith kissed me last night, I kissed her back. I actually liked it. I really liked it. Then I wigged out and ended up climbing in the window at your place," I told her. Willow stood there silently looking at me wide eyed. "Come on, Will, say something."

"What am I supposed to say?"

"I don't know something," I told her shrugging.

"How long have you known you were attracted to Faith?" Willow asked.

"I'm not sure. I guess I've always been somewhat attracted to Faith, I mean look at her she's hot," I started.

"I guess Faith really does have the hotness factor going for her," Willow said nodding. I looked at her with a raised brow and she began to blush. "Not that I think of her that because she totally all yours, and I would never do that to you. I would never do that at all. I'm going to stop now."

"Yeah word vomit never gets any better once it starts," I told her laughing. "Come here I want to show you something." I took her hand and led her upstairs to my room. I showed her the flowers Faith gave me. "Look at these."

"Those are amazing. Who gave them to you?" Willow asked

"Faith," I said shrugging.

"Really, Faith? That's a bit unexpected. How did she afford it?"

"I don't know I didn't ask. You don't think she stole them do you?" I asked.

"I can't promise she didn't. I mean this is Faith we're talking about, you know like bad girl central,"

"No, look, I'll talk to Faith and find out what's really going on; jumping to conclusions really won't help anybody," I told her. "Come on we better get back."

We went into the kitchen and grabbed some chips, a couple of sodas and took them into the living room. When we came in Faith turned to us and gave us a dimpled smile. "There you guys are thought you got lost or somethin'."

"Yeah, Faith and I had this wager going about whether or not the two of you got sucked into some portal from hell or not," Xander said grabbing a soda from us.

"Ha-ha, very funny," I said with an eye roll.

"You know you two really should joke about something like that. It could have really happened," Willow told them.

"Lighten up, Red," Faith said moving from the floor to the couch.

Willow huffed and took the spot that Faith had previously had on the floor next to Xander. I sat down on the couch next to Faith. Faith slid at little closer to me and put her arm around me. "What are you doing?" I asked.

"Getting comfortable. Don't you feel a bit more comfortable right now?" she said nuzzling my neck.

"Someone is going to see you," I told her.

"Do you really care?" she said kissing my cheek. "Plus they are so focused on the tv they won't notice a thing. Come on, I know you want to kiss me right now."

"Faith," I started.

"Shhh, they'll hear you," she whispered in my ear before turning my head towards her and kissing me.

I melted into the kiss and pulled her closer. I was lost in the kiss until I heard Xander's voice. "Please tell me this isn't one of my dreams."

We turned to find Xander looking at us with a sort of perverted smile on his face and Willow staring wide eyed.

_Shit,_ I thought to myself.


End file.
